Why I’m not a Film Theorist!

 

Who doesn’t love a crazy, yet bizarre film theory? Is Elf really a film about racism (or at least discrimination)? Why does Jack-Jack have the same hair as syndrome? Could the aliens from Monsters vs Aliens actually be part of a major conspiracy involving the infiltration of the white house? Is Tropic Thunder really the final film rather than the actual events that took place? Is Hot Tube Time Machine actually Lou’s second or third time travelling back to the 80s? What is the connection between Scooby Doo and Cabin in the Woods? Of course most of these films will have little to no evidence to support them.

These aren’t supposed to be super serious theories. This isn’t like the idea that Willy Wonka used children to make his chocolate or that all the Pixar films take place within the same universe. They’re just fun ideas I came up with (not remotely under the influence of marijuana, of course) and I figured I’d share them to see what you guys think so don’t take them too seriously and instead, just keep them in mind the next time you watch any of these films. Let’s dive right in:

 

Scooby in the Woods

This theory combines two ideas together: I’m sure all of you are familiar with Scooby Doo? Yes? Good! The live-action films will be the focus of this theory (although it does also relate to the cartoon). The other film that is involved in this theory is Cabin in the Woods. For those of you unfamiliar with Cabin in the Woods, it’s a sort of satirical take on the horror genre where the audience are represented by violent and cruel Gods who require human sacrifices to die in a terrifying and brutal fashion. In order for the sacrifices to count, the chosen 5 have to select their own death. In the film they choose a weird incest, red-neck zombie family to kill them. With me so far?

So there are 5 main characters in the film which relate to the 5 necessary sacrifices: you have the athlete, the scholar, the slut, the jester and the virgin. There are several rules that have to be followed in order for the Gods to accept the sacrifice, one of which being that the virgin has to die last. In Cabin in the Woods, there is a shady organisation that is essentially responsible for ensuring that the necessary sacrifices are made whenever the God’s demand it.

So how does all of this relate to Scooby Doo? Well the first thing that drew my attention to this comparison was the characters. Let’s look at the list of 5 suitable sacrifices: the athlete (Fred), the slut (Daphne), the scholar (Velma), the jester (Shaggy) and the virgin (Scooby). You may be wondering why I chose those roles for Shaggy and Scooby…well first of all, Scooby Doo does not have a dick (something my girlfriend pointed out to me) but also in the first Scooby Doo film, why is Scooby Doo chosen as a sacrifice? His soul is pure! Scooby is the virgin sacrifice who needs to die last in order for the Gods to be appeased.

That isn’t where the parallels end though. For starters, in Cabin in the Woods it’s the virgin and the jester who infiltrate the organisation where all the monsters come from. In Monsters Unleashed, the exact same thing happens. Shaggy and Scooby infiltrate the monster making factory in an attempt to put an end to the unleashing of the monsters. Furthermore, the athlete is taken down while on a motorbike which is true in both cases.

We can even take the entire comparison a step further. We can obviously view Mystery Inc as the chosen sacrifices. That much is clear. We can view the monsters as the monsters, again, a pretty straight forward comparison. What about the Gods? The Gods in Cabin in the Woods are supposed to be the viewers but in Scooby Doo its the public. We seen in both films that the public are very quick to appear whenever Mystery Inc are surviving/defeating the Monsters but when they are losing the Gods are hidden from view. So one could even argue that the “villains” who create the monsters in Scooby Doo are actually just trying to appease the Gods!

 

The Reproducing Man from Earth

I’m going to start off with a lesser known film: The Man from Earth. If you haven’t seen it before, you can find a trailer and some information (without spoilers) on my mind-fuck film list here! If you’ve seen it before then we can begin. So The Man from Earth follows John. He’s been many things throughout his immortal life (which I won’t list just in case someones eyes wander down here before they’ve seen the film. I can explain my theory without ruining the film anyway.

So John is immortal and he is asked about whether he has ever met anyone who is the same as him. He says he met somebody once and saw him again one other time but that he was lost in a crowd. When asked about love, John says that he has lost the capacity. I mean, after living thousands and thousands of years, how many loved ones has he lost? He’s lonely, even if he tries never to admit it, there are hints through his stories.

Eventually John must have grown sick of never finding anyone like him and so, he wondered if maybe his offspring shared his immortality. If he was an annomaly in nature, his offspring have an improved chance of also being the same. Even if the odds were low he had thousands and thousands of year to basically trial and error it. John had children, then moved away and then returned much later in their lives to see if they were old/dead.

How do we know this? At the end of the film we discover that Will (an elderly old man whose wife had died a few days previously) is actually the son of John the immortal man. It could just be coincidence that John ended up in the same place as his son…but considering how careful he seems to be when moving around, I don’t think this is the case.

So instead we have an immortal man who is travelling around impregnating women to try and find himself another one of his kind with whom he can travel and be less lonely. We see this idea being taken a step further when he allows Sandy to travel with him right after his son just died.

 

Elf

I have a couple of theories related to the film Elf. The much loved Christmas classic tells the story of Buddy the Elf. A human who was raised as an Elf before being sent back to New York to get his father off Santa’s naughty list. I’m not usually one for Christmas films (yes, I’m a Grinch!) but Elf is always highly entertaining!

So where does my theory begin? Well, right at the start of course. You may cast your mind back to similar stories such as Thor, where Odin take the child of a Frost Giant and raises it as his own son. There are slightly more sinister versions of the same story such as A Brave New World where a half-savage, half-cultured (if that’s even how you’d define him) boy is taken away from a world where he didn’t fit in…to a world where he still didn’t fit in.

I can’t help but think about the song “Half-Breed” by Blue Swede. The song revolves around a half-Cherokee, half white man who was never accepted by the Cherokee tribe he was born into but was always seen as a Cherokee by white people. I think this is a similar story to Elf. We view it as a ridiculous comedy about an Elf but what if there was a serious message behind it?

Buddy didn’t ask to be raised an Elf. He may have crawled into Santa’s bag but he was essentially kidnapped from the orphanage. He is raised in a world where magic is real and penguins and snowmen can talk. He grows up wearing the Elf attire, eating Elf food (mostly sugar), being incredibly friendly to everyone and helping Santa throughout the year so that he can deliver presents at Christmas. Yet when Buddy arrives in New York, despite the fact that he isn’t causing anybody any harm, he is ridiculed, belittled, treated like an idiot (he does essentially have the mind of a child) and struggles to fit in.

Think about it: he sings to his father because of a misunderstanding. He is told that that’s what is expected of him yet when he does it, he gets thrown out. He tries to make friends (with animals and people alike) only to be attacked or ignored. Smiling too much is even seen as annoying and soon he is instructed to do it less. The food he eats is seen as weird and bizarre, his excitement at Christmas seems over-the-top to the point that his “boss” thinks Corporate sent a professional. His friendliness is often seen as creepy (such as the shower scene) when really he just wants to spread happiness throughout the world.

So what is Elf? It’s the film about accepting those who are different than us. People may seem a little weird to you: their clothes may look ridiculous or rarely be washed, their food may seem strange or even inedible to you, their behaviours and attitudes come across as a little crazy but if we accept them as simply another human being trying to fit into our already crazy world then we learn the true meaning of Christmas and family.

I also had an idea that Buddy could perhaps have escaped from a cult or religion that he was indoctrinated into as a child. Perhaps there is no Santa or elves but these are just how Buddy’s child-like mind deals with the sudden return to reality. Nobody can really understand why he acts so strange but he’s been raised in “Elf culture” and after escaping, there was nobody to ease him back into the world. It’s sort of like that TV show where Amish teenagers go out into the world for the first time and have no idea what anything is or how to behave.

What do you think? Looking into a Christmas film a little too much? Maybe, but it doesn’t get any more sane from this point onwards.

 

Hot Tub Time Machine

My theory here is related to one of the main characters: Lou. If you haven’t seen the film, it’s a rather moronic tale of 3 friends and one of their nephews who travel through time via a hot tub to the 80s and proceed to interact with life then/there. I enjoy the film but it’s not great by any means and is mildly entertaining at best! That being said, the last time I watched it I noticed some very bizarre moments.

The main character Lou is seen as the deadbeat. His attempted suicide at the start is ultimately what leads to the group going on a skiing trip. My theory is this: Lou has been back in time this way before. If you’ve seen the film then this may sound a little ridiculous but bear with me!

Lou (we learn near the end of the film) is the father of Jacob. Jacob’s mother, also Adam’s sister is staying at the same ski resort as the guys. She’s in the same lodge as the enemy of Lou (Blaine). Anyway, for Lou to sleep with Adam’s sister and thereby create Jacob, he has to be at the same lodge as Blaine, who had just beaten Lou up twice (one of these times being slightly earlier that evening).

Lou is terrified of Blaine, even as an adult who has just travelled through time so in the original timeline he wouldn’t have been anywhere near that lodge and therefore nowhere near Kelly (Adam’s sister and Jacob’s mother). The only reason that they end up in the lodge is to get the Chernobyly (the energy drink that was basically responsible for sending them back in time).

This is what I think happened: I think Lou’s life was as awful as it appears in the film. He hates himself and everyone around him and comforts himself with drugs and alcohol (which is also a drug but I just wanted to be clear that alcohol was involved). Originally (let’s say in timeline 1) Jacob doesn’t exist. Lou, in a desperate attempt to reclaim his youth and reconnect with his best friends (only friends) tries to organise a ski. Adam is “super busy” (as is described in the film) and Nick doesn’t want to go without Adam (or alone with Lou) and so Lou, despite having booked the hotel room that was the same one they’d gone to before as young adults, takes the trip alone.

After getting drunk, taking drugs and ultimately ending up alone in his hot tub, Lou tries to drown himself. However, he wakes up in the 80s and comes to terms with the idea that somehow, he has travelled through time. In an attempt to change the future, Lou doesn’t walk into Blaine and therefore doesn’t get his ass kicked later that day. Lou parties hard, thinking that by changing this one moment of his past, he’ll have altered his life in the present drastically.

Eventually Lou ends up back in the present: nothing has changed at all (well, maybe some small things but for arguments sake, let’s say that this is still the same as timeline 1 i.e. Jacob doesn’t exist). He tries to tell his friends Adam and Nick about what happened, to bring them in so that they can explore the idea as a group again but they just don’t care. Lou angrily travels back to the 80s and goes around messing with the timeline. He convinces Adam to break up with Jenny, he sabotages Nicks performance and he sleeps with Kelly. Blaine, perhaps through jealousy decides to kick Lou’s ass because of this and when he returns to the present, a lot has changed.

This is timeline 2. He realises that Jacob exists in this universe and that’s why he hates Jacob so much. He resents this kid who is basically the symbol of his repeated fuck-ups. Jacob is a symbol of Lou’s guilt for ruining his friend’s lives (that’s why the film constantly asks the question of why Adam ever broke up with Jenny). In an attempt to change things, Lou travels back again but for some reason, whenever he travels back now the same events occur: Adam still breaks up with Jenny and Nick still performs poorly on stage. Lou doesn’t sleep with Kelly and as such, realises that Jacob is his son when he returns to timeline 3 which is another timeline where Jacob doesn’t exist.

In one final attempt, Lou travels back and sleeps with Kelly. He doesn’t consider staying in the 80s to live his life through to the present and as such, when he returns, Kelly isn’t a part of his life and neither is Jacob. So this time he is convinced to take his friends with him on yet another journey into the past. He knows from trying before that they won’t go willingly and so, he fakes a suicide attempt.

This is where we get into the events of the film. Lou doesn’t like Jacob, that much is true. He doesn’t want Jacob to come to the past with him because he’ll see how much of a loser his father was. He also doesn’t want Jacob being immune to any time changes. You’ll notice that his attitude starts to change towards Jacob once they are back in the 80s. They start to bond (yes, they almost have a threesome) but he just wants his kid to not be a loser like him.

Lou realises he needs to recreate the moment with Kelly which is why he starts laying groundwork early in the film. However, the mistake he makes is that he is convinced that his friends are on his team this time. They HAVE to help him fight Blaine this time. Don’t they? Lou thinks that Blaine is his demon that needs to be beaten. He can change his life around by not running and not getting his ass kicked. But Lou gets his ass kicked again and what’s worse, the chernobyly gets taken.

Lou has no plans to go back to the present and actually doesn’t really care if the guys go either. One thing he does know is that for his family life to begin, he and Kelly have to conceive Jacob. So when the others are busy searching for the Russian energy drink, Lou focuses on looking through Kelly’s stuff. He knows fine well that it isn’t there but assumes she will come back at some stage.

Everything else that happens is just what happens: Lou stays to spend time with Kelly, Jacob and to get rich (of course). He’s also helped the guys fix their mistakes and now he gets what he really wanted: his friends back.

 

Jack-Jack: Son of Syndrome

This one may sound a little whacky but it’s all just fun and games. I’m sure you’ve seen The Incredibles. If you haven’t then what are you still doing reading this? Go watch it…now! Anyway, you will of course be familiar with the Parr’s youngest child: Jack-Jack. We get to see some glimpses into his powers during the short Jack-Jack attack. However, I recently noticed that Jack-Jack doesn’t really look like his father. Instead, he resembles the villain: Syndrome.

We know that Syndrome has been watching a bunch of superheroes. We also know that Mr Incredible was his hero as a child. Essentially he was the reason that he went from being Incredi-boy to Syndrome. Why is this important?

Well, we have the scene where Syndrome acts surprised when he sees the Parr family all together. What if he wasn’t surprised? What if through his technology, Syndrome somehow planted his own DNA either into Mrs Incredible OR one step further: allowed the superhero genes of Mr and Mrs Incredible to merge to insure the kid had super powers BUT he also inserted his DNA in as well. Just look at the hair: Mr Incredible has blonde hair. Dash has blonde hair. Mrs Incredible has dark brown hair. Violet has dark hair. What about Jack-Jack? Ginger. Not only ginger but, look at the style. It is pointed up exactly like Syndrome’s. You may be thinking back to Syndrome as a kid when his hair didn’t look anything like that…but you have to keep in mind that his entire image was styled after Mr Incredible. So he flattened his hair in the same way.

Now this could just be a coincidence. Maybe they were just trying to cover as many hair colours within the Parr family to show that the powers are the result of a mutation and that the same mutations take place within other aspects of their genes. It could also just be a coincidence that Syndrome went home, collected Jack-Jack and planned to raise him as his own. It could even be that Jack-Jack is in some ways a clone of Syndrome but with the power-elements of Mr and Mrs Incredible. That way, even if Syndrome dies there will be a version of him with powers in the world. Something he’s always wanted.

 

The_Incredibles_-_Syndrome_-_Renderdownload

 

The Alien Conspiracy

Monsters Vs Alien is the exciting tale from Dreamworks about…well…Monsters Vs Aliens. This is a pretty minor theory but I think that it’s somewhat interesting. Ever notice that the symbol for the Monsters is the same shape as the alien spaceship? Interesting!

I haven’t fully developed this theory yet but I think it has something to do with Operation Bluebeam. What is this you ask? Let me explain. Operation Bluebeam is a conspiracy theory based around NASA. This theory relates to the use of hologram projections to convince people that the anti-Christ is taking over the world. Interestingly, there are variations of it with some conspiracy theorists claiming that the real plan is as follows:

NASA or their puppet masters (Operation Bluebeam is not something I buy into, I’m just explaining it the way that I heard it) would create an alien invasion through the use of projections. I don’t mean that they visually create an alien invasion…but rather they project holograms all around the world as if they are coming from a mothership. This “aliens” then threaten the destruction of Earth unless the human race agrees to be subservient. The nations that agree are then ruled through this method of projection. Those that don’t are destroyed through entirely terrestrial means.

In the film, the commander of the monsters has never had an opportunity to display their value. Much like the monsters, he has been locked away in a government facility until such a time as he is needed. As such, he convinces Dr Cockroach to assist him. In exchange for their freedom, Dr Cockroach must create the means to project an alien hologram around the world. He also has to create a mothership and giant alien robots. After all, Dr Cockroach has been locked up for decades at least. He can make anything out of anything.

The goal of this operation from the general’s point of view is to get into the White House. Not in as such (he can get in using codes and scans) but he needs a seat at the table, to be respected by his peers and to look good in the eyes of the president. (I couldn’t find a good photo of the alien space ship from above or below but i’m sure you see it from such an angle in the film and it looks exactly the same as the logo (left).

 

Tropic Thunder

This isn’t so much a theory as it is a realisation. Tropic Thunder opens with the information “…of the 10 men sent, 4 returned. Of those 4, 3 wrote a book. Of those 3, 2 were published. Of those 2, just 1 got a movie deal. This is the story of the men who attempted to make that movie.” We then assume that the film goes on to show the process of the film being made…BUT in actuality it’s the film of that film being made.

Everything in the film is dramatized for effect. The real director didn’t step on a mine, they just added that in. The war hero 4-leaf wasn’t a fake; they just needed a new twist. In the actual events of them making the film, chances are very little happened. A lot of money was wasted (similar to the start) and so the director takes them to the jungle and sets up cameras. The original film was filmed this way with 5 actors wandering through the jungle, trying to survive, acting out scenes as they went. Perhaps they get into some trouble but nothing to the scale of the film. When they get out, the film is a disaster.

Instead, they re-do the making of the film with all the drama and thrill and adrenaline pumping gunfights, drug addictions, deaths, character development etc. Focussing on the actors instead of the character they were supposed to be portraying.

 

Anyway, that’s my list of random “theories” that I’ve come up with. Pretty ridiculous, huh? I sometimes think it is fun to just randomly add a twist to films when you notice small details out of place.

 

If you have any of your own, feel free to post them below or Tweet me your ideas. Don’t forget to follow me here and on Twitter to be kept up-to-date with my blog posts, short stories and any updates on my novel! Peace!

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My Meditation Experience

 

I had this weird experience while listening to the Sam Harris guided meditation on Youtube (find a link at the bottom). Just to clarify before I go any further, I’m not religious whatsoever. I would class myself as spiritual but I’ve never really had any major experiences with my consciousness, even while meditating. I’d meditated many, many times and while it has been beneficial, my experience was never particularly bizarre. So for maybe the 10th or so time, I listened to this track. It also started off fairly routine with the focused breathing and becoming aware of sounds in the room. But when I first started becoming aware of my consciousness, I felt it expand.

Imagine the sun expanding and swallowing the Earth but rather than being yellow, its black, or at least very dark navy blue. It was like I was sinking into an expanding sun. Maybe it was more like a black hole. It got darker and darker the further I sunk.My heart rate actually increased and I could feel myself beginning to sweat. I almost lost my focus at this point because it was such an unusual experience for me. I guess it’s kind of similar to when you realise you’re lucid dreaming and get too excited and ultimately wake up. Luckily, I managed to concentrate on my breathing enough to continue.

When the audio reached the part where you open your eyes, I felt like what I was seeing wasn’t there: Like by opening my eyes I wasn’t seeing the outside world but more a projection of it. Like it could be real but more than like a screen was just turned on in my consciousness. I guess it could be compared to when a blank tv is turned on or a game loads up. The difference being that it was connected to the very base level of my mind. This was one of the creepy parts of the meditation as it made me feel like someone had just loaded reality onto my brain’s TV screen. I may not even be where my eyes are seeing. It could be like controlling a drone as it flies miles away. I guess that is kind of similar to how vision works.

When I closed my eyes again I started to notice bizarre feelings. Why were they bizarre? Well not only could I feel them, but I could also see them. The pressure on my back from the seat I was leaning against was a red wire or rope going straight from the bottom of my consciousness right up to the top. The seat colour itself was also red but that may have just been a coincidence as I couldn’t see or really remember the seat at this point in time. I could see my feet touching the floor as a green string, also going from the bottom to the top of my conscious field. I could see my hands touching my knees as bluey-green wire. This is where things started to get really trippy!

As I moved my hands, the string moved. Not necessarily because of the movement itself but more because of the change in sensation. Wiggling my fingers made the bluey-green strings vibrate. The more sensations I created, the more they vibrated until they became a sort of wiggle. They resembled a fluctuation chart going from its highest point to its lowest point over and over again: Like rolling hills that swoop down into sunken valleys. The weird thing was being able to experiment with this. Moving one part of my body and watching as the coloured string vibrated differently depending on the physical sensation I was feeling.

As I reached the second part where I opened my eyes, I felt my consciousness expanding (the same feeling of the sun expanding). I felt like I was in my head but also leaving it at the same time. Like my point of view stayed the same but the reach of my consciousness grew. It soon felt like I could reach out with my consciousness. Like at any moment I would make contact with the ceiling or the floor or the piece of paper that I could see. That at any moment I’d feel it as if I was touching it with my hand. I felt like my consciousness was a balloon gradually inflating. The centre of the balloon or sun stays in the same place; much like my centre but it is still expanding and reaching further.

So yeah, this was my most interesting and unique meditation experience (up until the day before I wrote this, I’ll write about that one soon). I’d had times where I’d come out of meditation at the end feelings a little strange or different but this was the first time I’d had proper visuals. Not to mention the whole expansion of consciousness feelings. I’m not sure that’s what people mean when they use the term ‘expansion of consciousness’ but that’s how it felt to me.

 

 

As always, feel free to comment with any questions or opinions. Hit the subscribe button to see more of my random-ass posts. Alternatively, follow my new and still empty Twitter @BakedHaggis to keep up to date with what I’m doing. Thanks for reading!

 

Sam Harris Meditation Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OboD7JrT0NE

Also, check out Sam Harris’s book Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion which is where I first found this guided meditation and learned that I could be spiritual simply by viewing consciousness differently and without having to believe in a God.

Time Travel: Participant in a Higher Being’s Experiment

So it has been a while since I last posted anything and figured what better way to get those creative juices flowing than with a thought-provoking question. I am opening this question up to anybody who feels like answering it. I am going to ask the question and then give my own personal response but I’d ask that you respond with your own answer before reading mine. I wouldn’t want your answer to be any way influenced by my own. There are of course no wrong answers; this is just a little bit of fun to see where everyone’s mind goes. Let us begin!

Imagine for a moment that you are visited by some multidimensional being: it can be a “God” or an alien or whatever entity you interpret it to be but when it contacts you the message you receive is very straightforward. You have been selected as a “participant” in an experiment where you will get to travel in time to whichever moment you choose. There are two options: you can either travel backwards along your own timeline in which case you will be the same age you were back then but with the mind of your current self (memories, intelligence, etc) or you can go out-with your own timeline either into the past or into the future in which case you will be in the body that you’re in when you leave.

There are however some rules: The first rule is that if you are travelling within your own timeline then you cannot take any technology back with you. You can take a single notebook back with you that contains whatever information you care to have with you. If you are travelling out-with your own timeline then you can take technology back with you, as much as you can fit in a bag but obviously you will be limited to how it can be used in whatever time period you choose. The second rule is that once you’ve traveled to your destination, you’re stuck there. You don’t get a redo or an option to travel back to the present. Wherever you choose to go, you then have to live your life from that moment onward until the day you die. The final rule (which is really a piece of information rather than a rule) is that there are no paradoxes so you can change whatever you want. If you decide to travel back in time to kill your great grandfather, then you won’t cease to exist. You can do whatever you like without there being any impact on your existence. The only real issue is that you’re stuck in that time to deal with whatever consequences there are. Just remember that you have no idea how each decision will alter the world around you (think of the butterflies!) so choose wisely!

Where do you go? What do you do? Go!

Here is my answer…be warned, I’m going to go into far too much detail with this but I enjoy thinking about scenarios such as this so hey ho!

So I would travel back along my own timeline to the age of 15 or 16. I would do everything pretty much the same with the only differences being that I’d try a little bit harder in school. The real reason would be so that I could compete in judo again but actually develop my “career” further rather than giving up. Up until the age of 18 I wouldn’t change anything drastically. I would however take a very full notebook back with me. This notebook would give me a very descriptive list of events that I know would happen between then and now, as well as a complete list of bets that would cover as many possible outcomes in order to give me plenty of options. This may seem very typical but I do have plans for this information. At the age of 18 I would go to university to do the exact same course I did and I’d befriend the same people and live the same life. During my 4 years at university I would use my handy little notebook to place incredibly “risky” bets with very high returns, I’d get involved in the stock market and buy shares with the knowledge of exactly when to sell, I’d buy lottery tickets that would give me back not millions but a few thousand every now and again. You might imagine that this would be for selfish reasons but actually, I’d have much bigger plans for this money than simply being able to afford a big house or a fancy car.

After the first year, I’d easily be a millionaire and at this point my real plan would come into play: across the UK I’d have partners who would place the same high bets with as many bookies as possible. These bets would be done online as well as in person. The purpose of this would be to drain the betting industry of as much money as possible. By the final year, when I’d acquired unimaginable wealth I would find a way to leak future outcomes of bets so that bookies had absolutely no reason to accept bets because people would know the outcomes. I mean sure, it would take a little time to build up a level of trust but eventually nobody would bet on the losing outcome. It might look a bit suspicious that I’d know those outcomes so I’d remain anonymous but I’d also suggest in my leaks that it was in fact the sporting industry that had rigged outcomes in their favour as a partnership with the betting industry. With a few years left until the present, I would open businesses that I knew would succeed (I’d have details of all this in my notebook) mostly within the alcohol industry (which is important to my plan later on. The main reason I’d move onto businesses is because with every bet I won or shares that I sold, there is a chance that I could change events so that my information becomes useless and inaccurate. The bets themselves would be less likely to change until I started sharing my knowledge of them but the stock market would be a different story. Public transport is an area I’d invest heavily in. I know from personal experience that the bus services in Scotland are awful and I’d get an unbelievable amount of satisfaction to replace the current services with a more reliable one. This wouldn’t make me much money because it would be an almost profit-free company, with the main purpose being providing a service to the people of Scotland. Any net profits would go back into the company or to the workers. I’d also start supporting the SNP (Scottish National Party) to try and help them win Scottish Independence. While all of this is going on I’d buy up land in Scotland (large, empty spaces) and start building a town/community there. Here, I would offer homeless accommodation to those who needed it. These people would work in my town in exchange for accommodation and would still get paid so they could leave whenever they wanted. My town would already be completely green and rely only on natural resources (more details that I’d have contained in my notebook). This town would take time to build and hopefully by this stage Scotland would have successfully become independent (an outcome which unfortunately did not take place the first time around). This would move me onto the next phase of my plan: drug legalisation.

The first step would be lobbying for weed legalisation with the main plan to have Scotland as a hub for its own weed. The biggest opposition to this plan would have been Westminster with its coke-snorting brats running the show but now that Scotland is independent, we wouldn’t have to get any ideas past them. With alcohol being a major problem in Scotland (both in terms of health and anti-social behaviour) weed would offer a calmer alternative and would hopefully bring the alcohol problem down a level or two. I’d be first in the door and would open up not only warehouses to grow weed but also shops to sell it, cafes, hotels, restaurants, retro arcades, weed tastings…pretty much everything you can imagine. The hub of all this would be my town which would be slowly expanding. Anyone who wanted somewhere to live could come, learn skills (courses which I would pay for) and then contribute to the expansion of my town. I would also begin buying new locations and starting the same idea from scratch, the idea being that no homeless person needed to be homeless in Scotland because there would always be somewhere for them to work and live. My only condition would be that anyone with issues (whether it be alcoholism, drug addiction, anger management etc) sought help through my organisation and tried to alter their behaviour. None of the shops in my towns would sell alcohol or tobacco but weed would be readily available. I would also have information centres where lectures and seminars would be given regarding other drugs as well as drug habits. This would be to ready people for the next phase of my plan. It would take a few years and by now I’d be in the “future” in relation to the point where this multidimensional being approached me but I would be trying to push Scotland (with hopes of moving it elsewhere) into a spiritual revolution.

Each of my towns would have centres built in them that would seemingly have no purpose or function. They would look a lot like hotels but far more therapeutic. The real reason I’d have them built is because sooner or later I’d have influenced Scottish politics in such a way that legalising drugs would be the next step and once again, I’d have my foot in the door long before anyone else. My centres would offer experiences with drugs in a safe and friendly environment. We would have shaman from the Amazon flown in to administer ayahuasca treatments in a spiritual and ritualistic environment, we’d have guides for mushroom or LSD trips, we’ve have soundproofed rooms where DMT trips could take place comfortably and undisturbed. Not to mention that we’d have meditation centres for those who wished to experience a more spiritual side of MDMA…as well as clubs for those who preferred the party side of things. These centres would be a safe haven for drug users and would reduce any unnecessary deaths that could occur from unsafe environments or overindulgence of the drugs themselves. It would go beyond taking the drug: there would be preparation time beforehand that for certain drugs would include diets, hydration, meditation, exercise or simply relaxation. There would be constant assistance for anyone who needed it or group care for those wishing to share the experience with friends or family. We would also offer therapy sessions with drugs. PTSD in soldiers has shown to be significantly reduced when the therapy session is accompanied with MDMA, LSD has been shown to work as a treatment for alcoholism, ayahuasca can lead people on spiritual journeys to solve unresolved issues. So there would be the entertainment side of things but there would also be the spiritual side which I hope would lead people down a more human path than what we are currently on.

With my investment in the alcohol, tobacco and weed industries, I’d begin to shut down distilleries of cheaper and more harmful alcohol. I’d do what I could to halt tobacco imports by doing whatever I could to increase the price as high as I possibly could. At the same time I would advertise my treatments of alcohol dependency and nicotine addictions. My plan would be to get rid of both as much as possible in Scotland. I’d continue to buy as much land as I could and I’d work on building an observatory with the most powerful telescope in the UK. This would be the focal point of my organisations next endeavour: space. Space travel isn’t something I’d aim to do but humanity (in my opinion) needs to find that child-like feeling of staring at the stars and just thinking “wow”. People could come from far and wide to camp under the stars in dark sports across the country that have minimal light pollution. Here we would have festivals that start of a stoners gazing into the nights sky and end with bonfires, singing and dancing, just bonding as a species.

A bit far-fetched? Perhaps…but it’s nothing more than a fantasy so I figure I’m allowed a little bit of wiggle room.  I could go into so much more detail of every tiny step and where this would lead or that would lead but I don’t want to bore anyone who takes the time to read this.

Consciousness: Our Journey Through the Multiverse

Imagine for a moment that you’re driving. Maybe you’re going to work or to the shop or just driving for the sake of driving. You’ve got some music playing and you’re momentarily caught up in whatever song is on, to the point that your concentration has begun to wander and without realising it, the car has just drifted over towards the side of the road a little too much. You’re nothing more than a few inches away from driving down the side of what would be a fatal drop. You notice just before you go over and straighten the car up on the road as your heart begins to race due to your near death experience…but what if it wasn’t a near death experience? What if you did actually die in that car accident but your consciousness instantly manifests itself into a reality where your car didn’t tip over the edge.

I’m going to assume you’ve heard of the multiverse theory and the many worlds interpretation? If not, then just understand that it is possible that there are an infinite number of universes that exist out-with our own and every time you make a choice or decision, there could potentially be another version of you in a different universe/reality where you made a different decision. That’s probably the easiest way to summarise it but I’d still advise you go read about it somewhere else or even just go watch a YouTube video about it…anyway, you’ve just been in this car crash but suddenly you are alive and as far as you’re concerned, you didn’t die but you nearly did; one second longer and you would have been over the edge of the road. Luckily you managed to notice in time. There may be a term for this idea already but if not, I’m going to call it reality jumping or consciousness-host magnetism.

When you think about how little we understand about consciousness, is it really a stretch to imagine that such a thing could be possible? Graham Hancock once said during a podcast that he views consciousness like a radio signal, in that our bodies are receiving the signal (similarly to a radio) but we have no knowledge of what the source is. Perhaps there is some hub out-with our universe and all universes that sends out a stream or signal so that we are always aware in one universe or another. Maybe we are aware in every universe but just at different times or perhaps we’re aware in every universe at the same time but we are simply one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively (as Bill Hicks once said). I don’t think there is ever any way we could discover such a thing but it’s certainly an interesting topic to think about.

So you die and then before you know it you’re nervously laughing in another universe about the fact that you almost died. Then again, maybe it’s not instant at all. I mean without anywhere to store memories, why would we have any recollection of the journey from one host to another? Perhaps we’ve actually spent billions or trillions of years floating through some dark void between universes but we simply can’t remember it. I guess time might not even exist in that dimension so you’re just an awareness floating through nothingness. Ever zone out and feel like you were a million miles away? Maybe it’s because you just died in another universe and your consciousness has only just re-emerged into this new body. That feeling of having drifted miles away could be like an after-image of the journey you just took. Why would we even be limited to one consciousness? Maybe there are hundreds, thousands or even millions of “you” inside your brain. Since there are potentially an infinite number of universes where the same events, there are theoretically an infinite number of versions of you that have had the exact same experience as you. So perhaps your consciousness just merges with theirs and you’re none the wiser. I mean why would you be? It’s almost like syncing up sound with video. When it’s done perfectly, you can’t notice that the two are in fact separate things. They become one functioning film or TV show. What if mental illness is merely the result of an incompatible consciousness trying to merge with the others? Imagine for a moment that your consciousness is like an item in a shop: it has a bar code on it that is unique to all those items not just that one, individual item. For example, all the white chocolate chip cookies would have the same bar code. What if in some weird, cosmic sense our consciousness (which for the purposes of this post I’m viewing as similar to a base soul or spirit that has no experiences or memories other than the ones that the host body has saved in its brain) has a bar code of sorts; Some unique pattern that allows it to find and merge with others of the same code. The only comparison I can think of is that ridiculous game where you fire coloured bubbles at other coloured bubbles and after a certain number are touching, they pop. What happens then when a slightly different or maybe even completely different code is combined with the others? I can’t think of a better example so I’m going to stick with this bubble pop (or whatever the game’s name is) comparison. If we view your consciousness as a circle or bubble, and everyone else in the entirety of human consciousness has a completely different shape to yours, then we can use the colour of the bubble to distinguish between one compatible bubble and another. So what happens when 5 red bubbles suddenly get joined by a green one? Well, that consciousness believes it is in the right place. It joins the others but the host body doesn’t have the compatible memories or experiences, it doesn’t like the same music or write with the same hand. While the consciousness has no memories, maybe it is programmed or has some sort of hard wiring that stops it from just merging with any host. To begin with it may just observe but soon it would naturally try and control the host body which goes against what is already happening. Maybe this causes a tear of sorts in the psyche and ultimately leads to mental illness. Maybe this also explains why some people feel like they are the wrong sex: perhaps in another universe they are a different gender. They are the same person in every other way but just were born a different sex. If we use the bubble analogy again, what if the host was initially a blue bubble (or several blue bubbles) but a pink bubble (yes I’m using gender stereotypes for the colours) latches on, then another, then another. Would the pink bubble eventually become the controlling force within that host body?

Maybe we could even take this a step further: I remember reading this short story of sorts online. I’ll try and find a link to it so that you can read it (here you go: http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html )…anyway, to summarise, this story suggests that when we die we come back as somebody else. Time is not important, you may die now and come back in 1450 but basically you are everyone else that ever has lived and ever will live. The story suggests that this is some form of maturing and that eventually you become a God-like being but you require the experience of all these different lifetimes before you can reach that level. So what if we take my consciousness idea and combine it with that: we could be a being that is living not only a potentially infinite number of versions of one life, but in fact a potentially infinite number of versions of every life. Maybe the code for each consciousness changes in a similar way to a counter. Perhaps you start out with 00001 (I’m of course simplifying this for the comparison) and the first 9 are the same life but after that one, you change to 00010. Each space could represent a new life that you’re to experience. Of course it wouldn’t be as simple as that or perhaps even as organised.

There is of course another way to look at this: Imagine that we don’t experience every universe but a select few. If there are an infinite number of universes then perhaps we experience a billion or a trillion and while we might not live in every one, when we die we have the option of restarting from that point in another universe that is the same. What if this group of universes is like a school or university or gym but in a crazy way that we can’t remotely comprehend while in it? Kind of like not realising you’re dreaming until you wake up. When we finish the combined experience of all these lifetimes, we emerge and can remember everything we’ve seen, learnt, touched, felt, etc. I guess the question then would be: what are we training for? To become Gods? Or are we merely foot soldiers in some sort of whacky alien training programme, preparing ourselves in a simulation for our upcoming war with humanity: Living a ridiculous number of lifetimes in a few weeks to learn their weaknesses and strengths? This is perhaps taking this train of thought a little too far outside the box but it’s fun to think about. Would our experience as humans alter our view on the war we’re about to have with them (now there is a film idea: aliens who live the lives of humans in a simulation that creates realities identical to the one true reality that they live in, only to ultimately find that they sympathize with us).

Of course I can’t imagine it being possible to ever prove or even theorize in any detail about such an idea. There would be something wonderfully relaxing about having such knowledge though. Would we fear death at all? Would we be sad for the deaths of our loved ones? I know religious people must be reading this thinking “well isn’t Heaven the same thing”. Maybe to you it is but as someone without not only the means to get to heaven but also the desire, I’d choose universe hopping over eternal suffering/bliss without a moment’s hesitation. There is also no need for any higher being to exist for such a theory to be true. I mean we know that electrons and such act in really crazy and mysterious ways so why not human consciousness? I mean isn’t it far more mysterious even without this theory?

This would undoubtedly lead to the moral dilemma of whether or not the new you in each universe really is you. I mean who are you? Are you the one, physical body or are you the experiences and memories that that body transports within the memory centres of the brain? Not that it would matter because you would always think that you are you due to being unable to remember your previous life/lives. For instance, I could have died in thousands of different ways already or perhaps this actually is my first life and I’ve been one of the lucky ones who just hasn’t died yet.

We would then also have the question of what happens when you die naturally? Do you just go to a universe where you live longer? There has to be a point where you quite simply do not live any longer in any universe in existence so what then? Do we just restart with no memories in a new, random universe as a baby? That part of it sounds more like hell to me: living longer and longer in each universe while being physically and mentally unable to take care of yourself and probably spending the majority of your time alone, practically begging for death. Not the most cheery note to end on but oh well!

Any thoughts on this post? Feel free to comment them below!

Simulation Theory: Are We Simply a Game for Aliens?

I’m sure most of us have played The Sims or seen The Matrix and therefore have at least a little understanding of the idea of a simulation: where the reality is nothing more than a computer generated world and those who dwell within it are completely unaware of this fact. I can’t claim to have any in-depth knowledge regarding simulation theory but this post is going to cover what I know so far and why I wouldn’t completely rule out the idea that we are in fact living in a simulated reality. I’ll also look at some potential uses these simulations would have.

 

It would be illogical to begin this post without first mentioning the famous philosopher Nick Bostrom, who is responsible for the simulation argument in the form of his trilemma:

1-The fraction of human-level civilizations that reach a posthuman stage (that is, one capable of running high-fidelity ancestor simulations) is very close to zero;

2-The fraction of posthuman civilizations that are interested in running ancestor-simulations is very close to zero;

3-The fraction of all people with our kind of experiences that are living in a simulation is very close to one.

This essentially proposes that the chances of us reaching a post-human stage and running ancestor simulations is unlikely, unless we are already living in a simulation. (At least that’s my understanding of it). When I initially encountered the idea of simulation theory, it was presented to me in the form of a series of questions meant as a thought experiment:

-Do you believe that at some point in humanity’s future we will have advanced to such a technological level that we are able to create or at least imitate consciousness?

-Do you believe that if we can create consciousness, we will be able to run simulations in order to see how people are likely to behave under certain situations?

-Do you believe that some of these simulations may aim to recreate human history, possibly from start to finish (or until the present day from their point of view) as well as creating simulations of worlds very similar to ours but with slight differences (e.g. JFK not getting assassinated)?

-If we have then created many, many simulations that are identical or very similar to that reality and we have made them as real as possible, spanning for thousands of years (within the simulation) with each individual within these simulations believing they are conscious beings, what is more likely: that you are one of many generated simulations or that you are living within the one true world?

 

The way I look at it is like this: what if in the future these computer generated realities or simulations are not only used for scientific purposes but also as a source of entertainment? For example, when people play video games, you know that characters are programmed to act a specific way e.g. they have limited chat options, they won’t leave their designated route or path within the game, some characters you can’t kill because it will impact the storyline. Even when you play online games with other real people, it isn’t realistic because the motives of people are based on the idea that it is just a game. So imagine the enjoyment of entering a realistic simulation where say Nazi Germany conquered the world and you are part of a small group trying to revolt against the Nazi regime. These people aren’t simply characters that will behave a certain way, they are instead generated consciousness that behave certain ways based on their life experiences, biological and chemical reactions inside their body (if you could call it that), they react differently to drugs and they experience the full array of human emotion. To these “characters”, you aren’t a player within a game, you are one of their comrades who has been with them since the beginning (you’d probably start this game at a young age). If you die in this game, that’s you done, game over. Would this be the end of the game? Not at all. Since it is a simulation, you could load it back to a previous point like any other game (whether this creates an identical “reality” or carries on the same one is a whole other question). If you made a decision you didn’t like then you could go back to that point and choose a different option. Not to mention that your actions would have the most realistic outcomes possible. I mean as someone who enjoys games where choices impact the world around you, I can only imagine the excitement of making decisions that have an infinite number of possible outcomes.

 

Along with being able to change the actual history of our world, we could change the physics, the technology, the species, the layout of the universe, anything. I read somewhere online during my initial discovery of the simulation theory, that someone had proposed the idea of religions being involved in the process. Imagine that you wanted to prove that religion was based on nothing but the lies of man. You could load up a simulation and produce a holy book. Perhaps we live in a simulation where the bible has been created to see what people do with such knowledge. Do they love and care for each other or do they create violence and hatred? I’ll leave you to come to your own conclusion on that one…but this could be taken a step further: you could create worlds where God(s) did exist. Imagine a world where the ancient Egyptian gods existed exactly how they are described. At the end of your “game” you die and get taken forth for judgement where you are deemed worthy or unworthy and advance accordingly depending on whether your heart is lighter than a feather or not. Maybe in a reality where the Judeo-Christian faith is accurate you basically get bonus levels: if the choices you made during the simulation where along the guidelines laid out by the bible then you’d go to the heaven level where you can bounce on clouds or whatever. If you lived a less-bible-like life then you’d be sent to hell where you would have to endure the tortures of hell.

 

This is all on the basis that it was in fact humans who initially ran these simulations but what if it wasn’t? What if homo sapien sapiens have literally just come into existence and there is a far more advanced alien species watching us, the same way we might watch sea-monkeys or ants. Perhaps this simulation technology is as basic as the wheel is to us now or shoes and they want to see how our species is likely to develop. Of course it wouldn’t be a way of predicting the future because there would be individual consciousness that would appear and alter things dramatically. It could, however, give you a basic idea of whether we would destroy ourselves or not as I’d imagine that all intelligent lifeforms go through similar stages of discovery. Perhaps it is simply a test to see whether our species is worthy or not. In a matter of minutes this alien species could run thousands of simulations, changing certain variables in an attempt to see how we act in any given situation.

 

This simulation idea can also be viewed from a completely different angle: what if everyone else within this world is merely a computer generated consciousness and you are the only “real” person. You’ve become far too lost in your game and rather than take a break or leave, you’ve become trapped, living the entire life of the character you’ve created, eventually convincing yourself that this is in fact the real world. I mean it has to be, right? The difficulty is that we can never confirm that anyone else is real, that they are aware of themselves or actually have consciousness. For all we know, they’ve been programmed to act a certain way or even worse, they are simply a computer generated consciousness that believes it is real. If we were to accept the fact that we were in a simulation, would we kill ourselves to get out? Of course not. We may be one of the computer generated minds and this could be the extent of our reality. Not to mention that films like Inception, The Matrix, even Wreck-It Ralph have warned us against dying in a dream/simulation/game. Could these be warning messages that appear in the form of films? A game such as this wouldn’t have a pause menu in which to read instructions or change settings. That doesn’t mean that information couldn’t be passed on through some form of media though.

 

This doesn’t even take into consideration a fairly recent discovery that physicist James Gate and his team made: that deep down within the mathematical equations of super symmetry were 1’s and 0’s i.e. binary code. I wish I knew more about this topic so that I could explain it more in-depth but I will post a link to a video where he discusses the discovery. From my brief reading on the topic, it seems that the binary code that was discovered isn’t just random but in fact relates to “Block Linear Self Dual Error Correcting Codes” which in essence are necessary for the correct exchange of code and information.

 

This leads to the next questions: If we were to work out that we’re nothing more than a computer simulated reality, what next? How would this alter our views of the world and the universe? Personally, I can’t say I’d mind too much. I mean on the one hand, at least if we’re simply computer generated then the survival of the human race and planet Earth doesn’t depend on us. We haven’t exactly been doing a stellar job so far. It would however raise some annoyingly impossible questions. Firstly, I’d want to know what the real world was like and what the species that created the simulation was. Would it be possible for us to communicate with this super-race? Maybe crop circles are messages from them that we haven’t been able to decipher as of yet. Secondly, I’d want to know the purpose of our simulation: was it there just to observe or were we a test for a specific variable? How many other simulations are there like ours? What happens when the simulation has ran its course and the questions have been answered, do we just get shut down? I can only begin to imagine what the answers to these questions would be. The impact it would have on us would be insane though. Ethics would have to be completely re-examined. I can only assume that all mainstream religions would suddenly change their tune to “We were right all along, God created this simulation for us to live in as a test”. What about our rights as simulations? I’m not a huge fan of this film but for those of you who have seen Source Code, you may have an idea of what I’m talking about. Perhaps this race of intelligent beings who create these simulations think that they are simply imitating consciousness and that we are nothing more than computer simulations. They could be completely ignorant to the fact that they are creating any number of new realities that exist within their own. Would we have some variation of the Turing Test that would compare our answers to specific questions to that of a “real” being? Does it make us any less real if we are in a machine but to us it’s an entire universe with life and memories and emotions? Is murder still murder if we aren’t actually living?

What if one day you were playing The Sims and your characters started doing things entirely on their own, carrying out tasks or actions that hadn’t existed in the game before. How would you act? Initially you’d probably ignore it and view it as a joke or some update that you’d missed. How would you  act if your sims carry on their lives even when you’re not watching or you return and there is a war going on? Let’s take it one step further: how would you act if one day you watched as your sims drew illustrations of simulation theory? You perhaps would be unable to understand their languages but a diagram could be quite clear. I’m not sure any of us would pay much attention to it and I’m sure we wouldn’t actually believe that these characters had become self-aware. Perhaps God is merely a teenage alien who created this planet and then got bored; left his game running, completely unaware of what has gone on in his absence.

If you guys seem to enjoy this post then i’ll come back and add a bit more where I can discuss the idea of the world or universe only rendering when the key character is nearby. I’ll also discuss the idea that certain drugs could let us see past the basic layout of this universe into what goes on behind the code. As well as how this simulation idea could fit in with the many worlds interpretation and the multiverse.

Video link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgSZA3NPpBs&list=WL&index=96

Are We Simply Thoughts An Alien Is Having?

So I’m currently working on a book and even though I’m still in the very early stages, I’m definitely beginning to make some progress. Rather than force ideas, I tend to just let them come naturally to me and then I see if I’m able to work on them. For example, if I go to bed earlier than usual, I’ll put some headphones on and listen to a playlist (which has since been named “Creativity”) and just see where my mind takes me in relation to my characters and events. When something interesting begins to form, I follow it in my mind much like Alice and the White Rabbit, leading myself down the proverbial rabbit hole.

Without going into too much detail about the book itself, I will mention that there is a religious group that has formed largely based on misinformation and corrupted ideas/beliefs. I’m still working on their overall belief system and while it’s almost fully formed, it’s constantly changing and evolving.

While listening to a particularly inspirational piece of music by Ludovico Einaudi I had this rather bizarre train of thought involving a collective consciousness, different planes of reality seen through different dimensions and grand beings that come together in a way which nobody could ever truly understand, like giant, multi-dimensional jigsaw pieces. While I’d love to talk more about this thought, it is not actually the topic of this entry today: instead I want to discuss the thought that followed.

As I mentioned before, I tend to just get in “the zone” as it were and let my mind and music guide my thoughts. I find that I now have music that applies to certain events or characters within my book and that while listening to it I’m able to quite clearly picture what is happening. It’s like having a film in my head that shows scenes where the music fits: much like the infamous music played during Darth Vader’s arrival in Star Wars.

My characters are still largely undeveloped in terms of personality but their actions are already beginning to define them within my mind. Anyway, while I was continuing on from my dive into potential additional religious beliefs I realised just how insane the human mind can be: Within my mind I’d created this new world that doesn’t exist anywhere else and without my mind it would simply fade from existence. When I close my eyes I can look around this world, I can see the characters that I’ve created and even when I’m not entirely sure what they look like, I know that they are there. It’s like I can see the space they should be taking up. I can watch as my characters interact with each other and with the world around them.

Even more than that: I can travel through both time and space to any moment, anywhere. With a simple thought I can watch different events happening in different ways with different people at different times. These characters aren’t always moved by my thoughts, sometimes they simply act, much like characters in a film.

At this point, I found myself wondering: ‘Is this all that god is?’ I began to wonder if we are simply an idea, a creation that is simply floating around inside the mind of a being greater than our level of understanding. How is any god deemed a creator any different to exactly that? We can never prove or even really investigate whether or not anyone other than ourselves has consciousness. So are we each just the main character in some higher beings created world? Simply a thought that is following a path that it’s been set on?

I remember a comparison that I always found interesting (I believe it was brought up by Alan Watts but that could be wrong) where he questions whether the rest of the world and everyone else in it actually exists out-with our interaction with them/it. He compares this to a video game. When you are playing a video game (take Assassins Creed for example) you can’t see the entire map all the time but as you travel from one side of the map to the other, the area renders and essentially comes into existence. Are there characters at the opposite side of the map from you walking around the streets of Rome? No. But as soon as you move near enough to them, they come into existence and begin to carry out whatever function they were put there to complete.

Once you leave that area they simply fade from the world until they are needed again. You tend to have differing types of characters in this comparison: you have the main/playable character who would of course be you in the real world; you have the story-related non-playable characters, who would be the people you interact with; then you have the secondary non-playable characters who are more like drones, who simply go from one spot to the next to perform whatever task makes them fit into the world.

I don’t believe in a god or gods (I’d actually describe myself as an anti-theist) but I thoroughly enjoy thinking about such matters, especially those that are out-with the typical structure of the modern gods. I feel like IF we were created by higher beings, they wouldn’t have created us simply to sit and watch as we tear ourselves to shreds, they would have created us for a purpose that we just can’t fully understand because it takes place in a dimension not available to us (which is what the religion within my book believe and in fact use to justify any immoral act they may commit). I’m being careful not to turn this into a religious post because its purpose is simply to show that insane ideas are just as likely to be real as any current religion.

This is of course much shorter than any of my other posts but it seemed like an interesting topic to bring up. I’d love to hear any opinions or even any other bizarre ideas that could potentially be a reality. Discussing crazy theories and ideas is incredibly enjoyable. I might make another post in the near future to introduce my fictional religion and the belief system it embodies as well as a brief look at their origin and how that relates to the rest of my book.

The X-Files: I Do Believe…Kind Of

My only experience prior to today regarding the X-Files, was watching the movie that came out in 2008 starring Billy Connelly. Considering how little I remember about it, I can’t claim it to be incredible. Yesterday, a new mini-series of The X-Files premiered on Fox. I can’t say I’m a huge fan of alien-related TV shows but boredom kicked in and I needed something to watch. I can now say with some certainty that I’ll be watching the rest of this series as it airs. If you haven’t watched the first episode and plan to, be warned that this post will be ridden with spoilers. It may be worth mentioning straight off that I do not believe in aliens. That is to say, I don’t believe that intelligent life has travelled to Earth in order to vandalise crop circles and anally examine unintelligent rednecks. I think it is completely possible that there may be life out there somewhere, I mean it would be crazy if there wasn’t given the sheer size of the observable universe. Anyway, now that that is out the way, it’s time to grab your tinfoil hat! We’re going for a ride!

As I already mentioned, I haven’t really watched The X-Files before but this new series essentially opens with the idea that the entire X-Files division of the FBI (where the two main characters: Mulder and Scully used to work) was its own conspiracy. As the episode unfolds, characters begin to explain that supposed alien abductions where actually orchestrated by the government in an attempt to keep tests and plans a secret. This is a rough summary of Mulder’s explanation of the grand conspiracy:

After Germany had been defeated, the hydrogen bomb posed a new threat to human life on Earth. This threat of extinction caused advanced alien species’ to become concerned for our survival and as a result, the skies of the US became home to regular UFO sightings. In an attempt to save our lives (while risking their own), crashes such as that at Roswell led to secret government divisions being created to allow both technological and biochemical studies to be carried out on the crashed ships/aliens. Classified studies were carried out at secret government bases which involved extracting alien tissue and experimenting with it on unwilling test subjects in an attempt to create alien-human hybrids. This was done by staging elaborate alien abductions on innocent civilians using the remnants of the crashed spaceships or in some cases they would use ships built on Earth based on the designs of crashed ships. Some experiments involved the forced implanting of alien embryos into women. When asked why their own government would do such a thing, Mulder replies “our own government lies as a matter of course, a matter of policy”, before giving some examples such as the Tuskegee experiments and Henrietta Lacks.

This is where Joel McHale’s character Tad O’Malley steps in, explaining that the overall goal is to conquer America before setting their sights on the whole world, by any means necessary. No matter how violent or cruel or efficient. He then gives an example of them using droughts as a tool, brought on by using secret, aerial contaminants and “high altitude electromagnetic waves”. He then goes on to explain that wars have been fuelled to keep them continuously going. He mentions that this is done to create problem, reaction, solution scenarios in an attempt to distract, enrage and overall enslave American citizens by using tools such as the Patriot Act and the National Defence Authorization Act. These acts allows areas of the constitution to be overlooked all in the name of “national security” such as the militarization of police forces in cities all across the US and the building of prison camps by the Federal Emergency Management Agency without any stated purpose. The manipulation of the food and pharmaceutical industries in an attempt to fatten, dull and control a populous already consumed by consumerism (they then throw in Bush saying “I encourage you all to go shopping more”). O’Malley then goes on to mention some of the more recent developments, mentioning the government tapping phones and collecting data/information, monitoring our whereabouts; a government ready to use this data against you. Of course this whole conspiracy would not be complete without mentioning the “well-oiled and well-armed, multinational group of elites” who are behind the whole thing.

This is where my interest in this show pretty much peaked: aliens are one thing but dodgy government cover-ups of human activities? That I can believe. When the episode first begins, we see O’Malley hosting his show, mentioning that 9/11 was a false flag operation. I’ll avoid getting into the whole “truther” debate right now because that just becomes exhausting. I will however point out that for those who think that the US government wouldn’t do that to its own people, guess again. Ever heard of Operation Northwood? Well without going into too much detail, Operation Northwood was a proposed false flag operation that would have involved areas such as the CIA committing acts of terrorism against the people of the US. Ultimately the proposal was shot down (much like the planes would have been had the proposal been accepted) by the Kennedy administration: Kennedy, who was assassinated the year after this proposal was put forward. The purpose of Operation Northwood was to create a public hatred towards Cuba, enough to justify going to war with Cuba without going against the wishes of the public. One proposed method was sending US soldiers dressed as Cuban soldiers to Guantanamo Bay and have them attack other US soldiers who were defending the area. Moving on…

Of course other areas within the X-Files conspiracy shine through as being unfortunately accurate: If the war in Vietnam didn’t highlight how warfare has become never-ending, then the war in Iraq certainly has. On the lead up to the Vietnam War, a major escalator known as The Gulf of Tonkin incident took place. This involved two separate engagements of North Vietnam ships and those belonging to the US. These events took place on the 2nd and 4th of August 1964. Since then, it has come to light that the “incident” that took place on the 4th was falsified. The outcome was the passage of the ‘Gulf of Tonkin Resolution’ by Congress, which allowed President Johnson to assist any Southeast Asian country who appeared to be under threat from communists. An NSA historian has since been quoted as saying “The parallels between the faulty intelligence on Tonkin Gulf and the manipulated intelligence used to justify the Iraq War make it all the more worthwhile to re-examine the events of August 1964.” When you look at Vietnam, soldiers couldn’t attack certain targets without express permission from higher ups which has often been used as an example of how the war was dragged out. I mean anyone with common sense knows that as long as war is profitable, there are going to be people happy they take place. I mean the people selling these weapons aren’t fighting with them; even their families won’t be involved. Instead they’ll be living off the interest that their billions or trillions of banked money creates for them. The Bush family sells weapons and we all know how the infamous George W turned up late for the war. Fun Fact (or not so fun): The US (or at least citizens within the US) copying a system developed by the Rothschild’s, bypassed the terms of Versailles Convention in order to build an oil refinery that would ultimately supply Goring’s division of the Luftwaff.

Another horrific example, this one mentioned by Mulder, is the Tuskegee experiments. Here, a large study spanning 40 years saw 600 African-American men being monitored in exchange for free health care and meals for participating in the study. Of the original 600, 399 had previously contracted syphilis. Despite the lure of free health care, none of the men were treated for syphilis. Of the original 399 men, 28 died from the illness, 100 died from syphilis-related complications. Not to mention that 40 of their wives had been infected with it, this led to at least 19 children being born with congenital syphilis. While this is a true example of something mentioned during the X-Files conspiracy rant, it was implied to have alien objectives which is of course fictitious (or is it?)(It is). It doesn’t for a second remove how unethical and disturbing this experiment was. Sometimes doing thing in the name of science requires leaving your humanity and morality at the door with your coat and shoes.

I’m sure I don’t need to delve into discussing the manipulation of the food and pharmaceutical industries in the US. As someone viewing it from the outside, I can’t help but compare the prescription system in the US to a giant cage full of mice in a science lab with the white-coated experimenters simply dropping assortments of pills into the food bowls and recording the results that follow. Of course this problem is slowly developing in other Western countries as well. GlaxoSmithKline would be one of my biggest examples: they were taken to court fairly recently for bribing GPs to prescribe their drug. To whom, you may be wondering. Well, not only was it wrongly prescribed to adults (it was an anti-depressant I believe) but it was also prescribed to children under the age of 18. Apparently the GPs were offered fishing trips and holidays in exchange for this hugely immoral act. It seems that any and every slightly abnormal behaviour requires some sort of mind-numbing combination of drugs in order to treat it. Where being easily distracted or too energetic was once brushed off as kids being kids, you will now see the ADHD diagnosis being flung around like…well…prescription drugs in America. Of course only the boring drugs get used as any of the remotely fun ones would be wildly unpredictable, regardless of their potential uses within our society *cough* weed has many medical uses *cough* MDMA can help treat PTSD *cough* studies suggest that LSD can treat other addictions while not poisoning the body whatsoever *cough*. You’re right, how dare I imply that illegal drugs can actually be beneficial in some way and actually cause more positive outcomes than being homeless on a corner somewhere with 12 aids-ridden needles sticking out of various veins while you suck cock for drugs.

Of course how could I even mention government conspiracies without bringing up the NSA and other forms of spying that the US and UK governments have been responsible for over the last few years; not just on enemies or even other countries, but actually on its own citizens. Of course many rationalise this criminal act as being “for our safety” or the famous “I have nothing to hide so I don’t mind”. Well people of the US, let me quote one of your own “They that give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety”. The whole “nothing to hide” comment is a different matter entirely A) Everyone has something to hide. You might not be selling drugs or searching for bomb schematics but there will be things on your phone, laptop, camera that you do not want the world to see and B) Saying such a moronic thing in response to being spied on, is like saying you don’t need the right to free speech because you have nothing to say (I read that comparison somewhere and take no responsibility for it). It’s even more irritating when you find the US acting all hurt and betrayed when it comes to light that the Chinese were doing the same thing to them but just at a lesser extent. Keep in mind that while this is all sold as being “for your own protection” the collecting of data hasn’t prevented any terrorist attacks or anything similar. I mean the NSA has been operating since before 9/11; it’s just that they became a lot more popular after such a massive attack due to the shift in public opinion. It seems much more likely that this data is being used to profile and study citizens. I mean the government’s reaction to the Snowden leaks was like a man catching his wife cheating by walking in during the post-sex cigarette. I mean talk about getting caught with your pants round your ankles. Yet this revelation caused very little response. Nobody is going to voice outrage against the US, it just won’t happen, especially when countries such as the UK are run by pig-molesting ass-kissers such as Cameron.

One thing to remember is that just because something is a conspiracy, doesn’t mean it isn’t true. Are there elites planning on taking over the world with alien technology? I won’t hold my breath. If you want to see the real slimy, inhuman monsters that are taking over the world, you need only follow the money to the richest families in the world. Power is their goal but money is their weapon of choice. Does that make me a paranoid conspiracy theorist? Perhaps…but I’d argue that I’m still a whole level below creationists or people who believe politicians are actually interested in the opinions of their country’s people.